What To Expect When Dating A Woman Who’s Been Single For A Long Time

by: Andrea Wesley

When you meet a woman who’s been single long-term and embark on a relationship together, there are some big differences you’ll notice from your past loves. For her, the transition from being completely independent to having someone around is a huge adjustment. She’s a harder nut to crack, so to speak, but once you figure her out, you’ll soon realize how absolutely worth it she is.

1. She’s used to alone time. She’s completely embraced the act of being alone and as such, she’s used to completing many life tasks and making attendances to gatherings solo. Having someone to do things with will be foreign at first, and she might opt to continue certain projects alone or hole up in her apartment to binge watch her favorite Netflix shows when you wish she was spending time with you instead. She needs a gradual transition into coupledom, so try to be patient.

2. She has protective walls in place. She’s been hurt before, which is likely the reason she’s spent a lot of time on her own. She’s more in tune with what she wants and needs in a partner, so she makes her selections carefully and keeps certain entrance points to her heart protected until she knows she can completely trust that your intentions are good and pure.

3. She wants to be vulnerable, but it takes a little more time. If she’s dating you, it’s because she really likes you. She’s probably crazier about you than you think, she just doesn’t show it as easily because she wants to be completely sure before she lets herself truly fall for you. She takes her time getting to know you before she rushes in full speed ahead because what she’s looking for is a long-lasting bond and she won’t sacrifice all the work she’s done on herself to achieve it.

4. She’s incredibly strong. She’s the definition of Miss Independent. She’s learned to be completely comfortable handling all of life’s challenges solo and because of this, she’s fiercely strong in a way that may make you wonder if she even wants you around. She does, which is why she’s dating you in the first place. This is also why she makes a great girlfriend, because she wants to date you despite having her life handled on her own.

5. You’ll wonder if she really likes you. She might not say overly flirty things in the beginning because she’s still figuring out in her head if it’s safe to do so. She’s no stranger to being let down and disappointed in relationships, so she really just needs a chance to sort it out in her head before she feels safe enough to let you in on how she’s feeling. If you’re patient and show that you can be trusted, you’ll feel more cared about than ever before, because when she actually shows her cards, she lays them down with her whole heart.

6. She’s scared. She’ll be apprehensive and at times she might even push back in fear of losing control of herself, since her control is her security. Keeping her emotions in check is the only thing she knows, so when she starts to feel real feelings, it catches her off guard and can make her feel like she needs to retreat temporarily to regain control of herself. It’s not personal, and she’ll come back.

7. She’s not used to having help, but eventually she’ll embrace it. If you try to offer her help and she declines, it might make you feel useless in her life. It isn’t intentional, she’s just used to doing everything and anything she needs to with her own two hands. Soon enough, though, you’ll be opening all her pickle jars and helping her with the heavy loads of groceries she carries expertly in one trip.

8. She doesn’t need you, she chose you. Above anything else, despite being completely OK on her own and content with handling all of life’s responsibilities solo, she’s chosen to invest her time and take a chance with you. It’s the purest form of affection and desire you could ever hope for, because the girl that’s been single for a long time doesn’t necessarily need a man in her life, but she’s chosen you anyway. She’s spent the time getting to know what she wants, and if you’re the one she’s picked, then congratulations — she’s a definite keeper.

– See more at: http://thebolde.com/what-to-expect-when-dating-a-woman-whos-been-single-for-a-long-time/#sthash.twIsDIG4.dpuf

Maya Angelou’s “Phenomenal Woman”

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,
They say they still can’t see.
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need for my care.
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.